Following the awesomeness of Achilles (link), the next one in the line of heroes takes a little more passive role. Sun Tzu is most famous for writing the Art of War, often famously quoted with “all warfare is based on deception” or a paraphrasing of some sort.
I’d like to take the extra time I have at my disposal now (desk job with internet acces) to write a new series of articles. The theme of the series will be heroes. But not just heroes, oh no. I have selected 9 indivduals from various eras of history and corners of the Earth that I believe are true shining examples of mankind.
This apparently is the opinion of several ‘leading sexual health charities’. This can’t go wrong at all.
Just the other day the awesome parliament of USA2 the European Union voted on what could be the fate of european internet freedom. The main problem would be that the new agreement allows governments to disconnect users from the internet permanently after three suspected cases of internet piracy. It doesn’t need Demosthenes to see that there’s a whole lot of wrong with that.
Many people in our wide vast world have the uncanny ability of being tremendously stupid. A simple dive into any random message board over the internet will reveal such a fact. Regardless of the nature of the board, there are always people who just don’t ‘get’ the internet. As such, you may find posts as “how can I get this girl to like me” on a bodybuilding forum or “what should I give my near-dead grandma for her birthday” on a forum concerning a specific breed of cats. Personally, I never really understood why these digital misfits do this. However, once in a while something interesting happens. A certain braindead user may ask a question like “what should I prepare for my job interview”, this being a retarded question. But it may happen that such a topic could quite well evolve into a digital sanctuary for people exchanging tips and tricks, hence raising its usefulness by a factor of infinite. For this purpose today’s article; Vicious on Life.
In a world where people believe in gemstone therapy, dowsing, ghosts and homeopathy of all things it is only natural that people look into the miracle of extraordinary supernatural senses. For many an office drone seeing, smelling, feeling, hearing and tasting just isn’t enough. Oh no, these people want to be special. And thus they practice and practice and practice until they have deluded themselves in believing their own supernatural hocus-pocus. Vicious goes undercover in a sixth-sense-society and comes back with the six most extraordinary (useless) supersenses.
This just in, an epic scientific study shows that the most prevalent cause of all the enormous people around us is not our boring sedentary lifestyle, but is in fact our gluttonous craving (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2074518/Obesity-epidemic-%27not-caused-by-idleness%27.html). This is in contrast to what has generally assumed to be the case; a mix of being a sloth and stuffing yourself. But alas, science has proven otherwise. And a s a scientist in heart and trade I must bow down and accept.
Many a people believe that the world is secretly governed by some malignant ethnic group controlling all the major world governments and orchestrating major world events. Talk with such a person and ask him who is responsible for the attack on the Twin Towers. There’s a good chance he’ll say either “the Jews” or “the government”, and later on explain how those two are actually the same. Unfortunately for these people, their anger is misdirected. The general idea is good, but the object of their hatred (Jews) is quite incorrect. In truth, it are the Eskimos that direct the New World Order.
Unless you have been living under a rock for the past month, you have probably heard of the Austrian Incest Case ™. Apparently some dude sexually abused his daughter for TWENTY FOUR YEARS, giving birth to SEVEN CHILDREN and not a single soul suspected a thing. Of course I could go on for pages on how this is absolutely horribly wrong and all that blablabla, but I think we all agree on that so I won’t.
When you stop to think about it, names are actually quite a cool concept. They are probably as old as human speech itself and must have been ‘developed’ for lack of a better word to directly identify individual persons. Perhaps even slightly more awesome was the invention of titles. Titles are both more versatile and more static than names. Static because titles tend to refer to a single function (e.g. emperor, doctor or police officer). By this title and hence role alone a person is not defined. More interesting however is the versatility of these titles. Titles are dynamic, automatically making them interesting. But more important is their ability to interfere with names.
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