Many a people believe that the world is secretly governed by some malignant ethnic group controlling all the major world governments and orchestrating major world events. Talk with such a person and ask him who is responsible for the attack on the Twin Towers. There’s a good chance he’ll say either “the Jews” or “the government”, and later on explain how those two are actually the same. Unfortunately for these people, their anger is misdirected. The general idea is good, but the object of their hatred (Jews) is quite incorrect. In truth, it are the Eskimos that direct the New World Order.
‘Eskimos’ (or Esquimeaux as they refer to one another amongst themselves) are the native inhabitants of the area that can be roughly defined as ‘between and including Alaska and Greenland’. Now what I am about to tell you will come as a shock to many, but it are in fact the Esquimeaux that are responsible for the century-long manipulation of our collective Earth-based society ever since their discovery that there is a greater world outside the permanently frozen tundra’s of the North.
‘Why the Esquimeaux?” one might ask? The answer is remarkably simple; diet. You see, due to the nature of their habitat, the Esquimeaux could not eat what we call ‘a balanced diet’, as growing vegetables or fruit is not permitted by the icy conditions. Because of this, practically all of the food comes from animals. To get a little more technical here; it has been estimated that around 75% of an Esquimeaux energy supply is derived from fats (the remainder from protein). Behavioral and Nutritional scientists speculate that this diet might stimulate brain growth and, to avoid technical jargon, basically increase intelligence up to a threefold. So this answers our original question; why the Esquimeaux? Because they can!
While I could go on for hours on the subtle manipulation perpetrated by our frosty cousins, for the purpose of this article I would like to focus on the common theme present in all plots; global warming. As many have speculated, global warming is quite not-real. While it is true that the Earth is slightly warming, this is normal for the planet to do periodically. Furthermore, it is also true that the greenhouse gasses basically keep the planet warm. Now before I continue, consider that only a small part of the planet (arctic circles) is cold enough for Esquimeaux to feel at home. However, as is human nature, they are not satisfied with this. Naturally they feel the need to expand. For this purpose, top Esquimeaux thinkers and elders (remember their vastly superior intellect) devised the plan of all plans; the global warming hoax.
The execution is remarkably simple; perpetuate the belief that humans are directly responsible for the warming of our little mud ball by the amount of greenhouse gasses ejected in the air. When people hear this long enough, they will try to decrease their CO2 output, thus decreasing the total amount of it that is used to keep the Earth on its current temperature. Hence, the net result will actually be a great sudden drop in Earth temperature! This drop will be enough to bring the average temperature around the equator to near sub-zero temperature! As you have undoubtfully figured out by now, this results in a huge increase of land for the Esquimeaux to thrive in while resulting in a decrease in efficiency for many other ethnic groups.
The Esquimeaux’ icy modus operandi is manipulation. Using superior intellect, they have manipulated modern media to suit their own needs while coming up with catchy phrases as ‘carbon footprint’. Simply put; this must end. I propose no calling to arms or angry mob mentality of any kind, but simple education. Thus, spread the word of what you have read today to all who will listen and educate yourself on global warming and ‘Eskimos’ as soon and extensive as possible.
This has gone on long enough.
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