When I was a kid, during Easter we went out in the garden to look for painted eggs my and Evil’s parents hide. It was great fun and we enjoyed it tremendously. Now everything is different. Recently while shopping I suddenly noticed that Easter has gone the way of Christmas. Suddenly I was bombarded by gigantic green posters clouded with eggs and a rather intimidating bunny. Then it hit me; for some odd reason companies have decided that from this year forth Easter is to be the new Christmas #2.
This isn’t just my imagination either. I went out buying supplies for the weekend when I crossed pahts with six (!) Easter-themed tasting booths! I read in the newspaper that companies have started out giving Easter-packs (parallel to Christmas-packs) to employees. Of course one can’t truely blame companies for commercialising another holiday. After all they only go as far as the public allows them. However, as we progress to another grand holiday, I would like to pass on some suggestions;
- Easter-presents should be given, crucified to small chocolate crosses.
- Parallel to Christmas trees, gigantic replica bunny-skeletons coated with chocolate should adorn every household.
- Start painting white X’s on our doors again.
- Following the above, slay our firstborns to promote multiple-child families again.
- Chocolate-fondue.
Why not? We already have the fucking snow…
If you liked this article, please donate and find out for yourself that the greatest gift is to give to others
March 24th, 2008 at 11:27 am
Yup, although there’s only so much they can do with Easter. There was an article on Slate.com a couple of days ago that basically explained that the Easter story resists commercialization and secularizing much more than the Christmas story does. So does Passover, as you point out.
What’s sad is the commercialization of the religious meaning of Easter. I saw a stuffed rabbit in Walmart a while back, holding a stuffed Bible, that would play “Awesome God” if you pressed his paw. I am not kidding.
And I won’t even get started on the utterly terrifying Elmo Easter basket they were also carrying.
March 24th, 2008 at 12:38 pm
“I saw a stuffed rabbit in Walmart a while back, holding a stuffed Bible, that would play “Awesome God” if you pressed his paw.”
Actually this is kind of cool.
I’m more perplexed by the speed of the commercialization than the actual fact though.
March 25th, 2008 at 11:44 am
I agree with that snow
On Friday I asked my mother, is it Easter or Christmas 
Here in middle Europe it is not very commercialized yet… But I would not buy more than it is necessary. Only few chocolate eggs or smaller bunnies.
March 27th, 2008 at 4:02 pm
Chocolate eggs are the best things ever. Although I have spotted traditional Christmas-candy simply renamed for Easter…
April 24th, 2008 at 11:12 pm
When the corporations are done, every day of the year will be turned in a Christmas-type celebration. Also I completely agree with your suggestions of rabbit skeletons and slaying firstborns.