After the apparent raging success of web logs, so called blogs, youtube started a new trend; video logs (vlogs). As a rational human being, I approach this new phenomenon with care. On the one hand, I always get a laugh out of them. On the other hand, I laugh because they are absolutely pathetic.
My first issue is with the name; vlog, vlogs and vlogging. ‘Blog’ was already bad. ‘Blogging’ seems like a way to describe the sound of vomiting. ‘Vlog’, however, takes it to the whole next level. The word is both visually and audibly displeasing. It sounds as if it were some sort of fetish. And it would probably be illegal if that were so. For that reason alone, I will refer to it as ‘video logging’ from now on.
My second problem results from the concept of logs in general. Logs are great. If you are an interesting person. There is a reason why ordinary diaries usually go unpublished; they stink. As such, so does your video log because you are an uninteresting person with an uninteresting life. Also, words make a better medium to convey thoughts and emotions because it allows the reader to use his/her imagination, which brings us to my final point;
You are very ugly. While not a crime in itself, it should be. At least watching someone of the opposite sex allows one’s mind to wonder to more sensual subjects. Again, reading a story allows me to imagine all kind of sexy people inhabiting my perfect world. Your story on the other hand, annoys me due to your aesthetically displeasing look. For those who would contest the physical attractiveness of video loggers by suggesting not all are hideous beasts; you are wrong.
Finally, to illustrate my point, here are some examples of video logs. All logs were found by searching for ‘vlog’ in youtube (examples from the first page).
Hyperactive girl does some stupid shit. The title is ‘No More Sugar Vlog’ which I can only hope relates to her new diet that will eventually cause her muscles to consume themselves due to lack of nutrients. And like, I also, like, you know, hate people who like, you know, use like to much.
Hi Schmully. My, is it Sunday already? How fascinating. Also, he said something about corporations and advertisements being out of touch with the target demographic. Well no shit sherlock, I hope you have a good sweater, it’s cold in the deepest pits of hell!
When I read the title ‘Vlog #6 Girls/Women’ I know I was in for fun, for I was about to see some social retard giving women advice. Unfortunately though, I think he is not serious. That does not take away from his godawful voice though.
Hi Greg from Mediocre Films. That might be overrating yourself Greg. Diagnosis; boring.
Some girl. Oh no, she mentioned MySpace in a video log, such a vicious cycle of ignorance might collapse the universe. This girl is a drama queen in the making. She is apparently busy copying a recording of a Junior High play in which she played on DVD, claiming people were in tears over the performance, which is finally something I am willing to believe. The rest was no-sense-making bullshit.
That’s all for today. Do you know some video logs? Drop us a line!
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