In my previous article you could find a not so nice list containing the seven Catholic cardinal sins. In case you are too lazy to click the link provided, they are; lust, gluttony, greed, sloth, envy, wrath and vanity. Today, I will tell you about the sins of those who lack self control, welcome to the realm of lust and gluttony. In other words, welcome to the totally awesome world of the sexual deviant fat guy.

Lust

in this context refers to obsessive desires for sex. To find this one is perhaps the easiest task of them all. For some reason, we humans seem to come up with the strangest fetishes seemingly possible. If you get offended easily, you might want to skip over to gluttony right about now. For the rest of you brave knights, here are some particular gems of sexuality we can all be proud of:

• formicophilia, being aroused by insects covering one’s genitals;
• furry fetish, feeling attracted to persons dressed as animals;
• unbirth fetish, the direct opposite of giving birth (what the fuck is wrong with these people?);
• siderodromophilia, sexual atrraction to trains (what the hell?);
• arborphilia, sexual attraction to trees (at least trains are cool and fast);
• diaper fetish, need I truly explain this one?

Am I the only one that finds it somewhat weird that somebody actually went to the trouble of naming these fetishes instead of laughing in the sick fuck’s face and calling the cops?

Ofcourse, these are just the top of the disgusting iceberg, and you should be grateful I spared you the more disturbing ones that involve mutilation, rape, death or more likely a combination of those three.
Vicious’ conclusion; I propose death by drowning.

Gluttony

or overindulgence is used to indicate the excessive consumption of resources, mainly food and drink. To illustrate my point, I will share with you the results according to a study by the World Health Organization. There are more overweight people in the world than starving people. I will give you a few moments to let that sink in; there are actually more fat people on this planet than hungry people.

For those interested in the numbers, there are about 800 million underweight and 1 billion overweight persons (note that I took the smallest number I could find) in the world, of which 300 million obese. Underweight, overweight and obesity are determined by the BMI scale, google it if you feel the need to. Know I know that not all fat people are to blame for their condition, but even if we say that 1/5 of the overweight bastards are fat because of some fluke in their genetics, that still leaves us with a 1:1 ratio which is pretty sick.

But if you think I feel no sympathy for the fat, you are right. I used to be at the bottom of the overweight scale myself before I started getting off my fat ass and started exercising and controlling my eating habits. It’s well within the realm of possibilities to lose some goddamn weight.
Vicious’ conclusion; process them into hot dogs and feed them to Africa.

These turned out longer than I thought, so I will save greed for next time. Until then, start working out or doing fitness if your fat, or start being normal if you recognise yourself in any way in the Lust-part.

Any sins of your own to add? Drop us a line.

Updates;

The State of the World (0/7)

Lust and Gluttony (2/7)Â <-Â you are here

Greed and Sloth (4/7)

Envy and Wrath (6/7)

Vanity and the conclusion (7/7)

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